Archive for the ‘funny’ Category

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The new voting machines look familiar.

April 4, 2016

new voting machines

I was going to make few jokes here at the expense of the current presidential candidates, but at this point they honestly don’t need any help.

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Things that go “fist bump” in the night.

March 18, 2016

fist bump in the night

I know it’s been a long time since I posted any content on this blog, but my kids are growing up a bit and I find I have (slightly) more time on my hands.

Our youngest child is now three years old.  Unlike many others of his age, he has never resisted his bedtime.  In fact, he has a grand time rushing through an increasingly lengthy string of goodnight sayings to each member of the family.  These currently  include: good night, sleep tight, sweet dreams, night night, I love you, and see you in the morning.

However, the speed at which he rattles these phrases off at makes it sounds more like – “Goodnightsleeptightsweetdreamsnightnightiloveyouseeyouinthemorning!

It is usually the last thing he says before he  closes his door for the final bedtime story and snuggle with his Mom.

However, the other night he opened the door again seconds after closing it.  I waited to see what adorable phrase he was adding to the mix now.

He looked at me with his large ernest eyes and said very quietly, “Our house doesn’t have any ghosts…”

“…anymore.”

The door began to shut again.  Just before it clicked, he cracked it open once more and whispered, “Don’t be scared.

As I said above, I finally have enough time to start posting some new drawings.  Goodness knows I’m not using any of it sleeping anymore.

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Yes, you can use too much lighter fluid.

May 17, 2010

Because it is barbeque season, I decided to post the best barbeque sauce recipe in world.  Really!  (It is actually a sauce and a second separate paste, but it is well worth the minimal extra effort.)

Enjoy!

The World’s Best Barbeque Sauce:

  • 2 c. grape soda (yup, grape soda)
  • 2 c. ketchup
  • 1/2 c. apple cider vinegar
  • 1/4 c. yellow mustard
  • 1/4 c. sugar
  • 4 TB black pepper
  • 2 TB Tabasco Sauce
  • 2 TB garlic salt

Simmer until thick (but still thinner than store brand) while stirring constantly.

Brush sauce directly onto the meat as it grills.  After sauce has thickened from heat of the grill, add a mixture of brown sugar and vinegar to the meat.  We have never measured the amounts of brown sugar or vinegar – just make sure it is thick.  You can also just do the sauce alone, but it is quite a bit spicier without the brown sugar and vinegar paste.

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GI Tract Joe: the educational action figure.

May 9, 2010

Kids love fun so they demand nifty toys.  Moms like learning so they demand educational products.  Companies want to make money so they listen to these demands and create “educational” toys and games.

Moms of the world, we love you – but that doesn’t mean we love toys that make us work to play.  Now you know and knowing is half the battle.

Happy Mother’s Day.

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The spirit is weak, but the chin is strong.

May 6, 2010

In comic books the guys with big chins are superheros (think Superman and Batman).  In real life we get Quentin Tarantino.  And let’s be honest, he’s no Superman.

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There was no question, he was a lucky duck.

May 5, 2010

Just in case you can’t tell, that is a 100 dollar bill he is holding.  I know a hundred bucks isn’t worth what it once was, but he would still be the richest duck I’ve ever seen.

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The steroids were having some unexpected side effects.

May 4, 2010

When I was younger, I spent time at a local gym called Family, Fitness, and Fun.  There was one man who worked out at the same that was most definitely a steroid user.  Although he didn’t have horns or fangs, he suffered from regular bouts of “roid rage.”  One day he failed an attempted lift and started spewing every foul word imaginable.  It was so loud and so profane that everyone in the gym froze.

When he had finally finished, my friend loudly said, “FAMILY, fitness, and fun,” emphasizing the word family.  There were some laughs.  And even a few claps.  Obviously, everyone agreed the guy was out of line.

Almost everyone.

Personally, I was more concerned about making fun of the largest, angriest person in the room.