Posts Tagged ‘family’

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Some Topknots are more fabulous than fierce.

January 30, 2014

fabulous topknot

At the end of last year my wife and I celebrated a milestone.  Two of our three children are now able to operate with complete independence in the bathroom…

… or so we thought…

It was my Mother (Nana to the kids) who first noticed the suspicious drips and drops sprinkling her bathroom floor.  The splashes were noted again and again over the course of several weeks whenever our three-year-old (Emma) had been there.  Each time, the mysterious moisture was dismissed by Nana as the product of enthusiastic hand washing.

The way Nana tells the story, she accidentally walked in on Emma using the potty.   She opened the bathroom door to find her beautiful and perfect granddaughter bent over the toilet with one arm completely inside the bowl, vigorously splashing the contents.  Emma apparently looked at her and said brightly, “I’m cleaning the potty!”

Nana was so shocked that she didn’t say anything.  Emma evidently saw the concern on Nana’s face.  She followed up with, “It’s okay, I’m using a brush,” pulling her arm from the toilet and brandishing a dripping wet brush in her small hand.

It wasn’t actually a cleaning brush, but rather Nana’s hair brush.

The same hair brush Nana used on her head each and every day of her life after she bathed.

Each and every day – including the past several weeks that it had also been moonlighting as a toilet brush.

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Penguins don’t do casual Fridays.

February 23, 2013

penguins dont do casual

Two nights ago while brushing our teeth, I was asking our daughter Emma what sounds different animals make.  We started with the easy pet types (cats, dogs, and birds) before moving on to barnyard livestock (cows, roosters, pigs, horses).  Like every other two-year-old in the world, she was a pro at mimicking each of these creatures.

It wasn’t until we came to some of the more exotic members of the wild kingdom that things started to get interesting.

          Me: What does an elephant sound like?

          Emma: Achoooooooo!

          Me: Achoooooooo?

          Emma: Yeah.  Their big noses…  achoooooooo!

          Me: Okay.  How about a Penguin?

         Emma: /high-pitched, squeaky voice/ Penguin, penguin, penguin.

         Me: That’s what they say?

          Emma: Baby penguins.  Mama penguins say – PENGUIN, PENGUIN, PENGUIN!

          Me: Wow.  Well, what noise do monkeys make?

          Emma: I like pink bananas!

She delivered each of these answers with no hesitation and complete confidence.  At the moment, we’re not sure if she’s a little bit brilliant or just completely batty.

Either way, she’s awfully entertaining.

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Gray pride.

September 16, 2011

This week my Grandfather (Dad’s Dad) passed away.  He was raised in a coal mining town in Pennsylvania.  Like most of his generation, he fought in WWII.  The stories he told about his time in France were especially fascinating.

One of my favorites was about a time that he and two other men were separated from their unit in France.  They had a jeep and were driving frantically through some back country roads searching for any friendly forces.  As they drove through one small village they were swamped by a growing crowd that eventually pulled them from their jeep.  The people of this particular village thought that they were being liberated by the three lost Americans.  My Grandfather said that there was dancing, speeches, and an even an impromptu parade in their honor.  As none of the Americans spoke French and none of the villagers spoke English, they had to stay until the crowd thinned enough that they could drive on.

After WWII he came back to the states and found a job as a stock boy for Hallmark Cards.  He worked hard and managed to earn promotion after promotion in the company.  When he retired from the company in the 80’s he had earned the title of Vice President.  It isn’t often that someone moves from the lowest to one of the highest positions in a Fortune 500 corporation.

Not bad for a coal town kid with no formal education.

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No. The 5 second rule doesn’t apply.

August 16, 2011


Personally, the 5 second rule doesn’t apply to anything I eat.  If I drop it, it’s dead to me.

My daughters, on the other hand, subscribe to a completely different belief.  The closest description I can think of is, “Finders Keepers.”  Time never even enters the equation.

Yuck.

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He decided to upgrade his memory.

February 25, 2011

I often show my older daughter pictures before I post them.  I like to ask her what she sees.  Usually, even from her unique four-year-old perspective, she “gets” the jokes (or at least recognizes that the picture is silly).  Usually, but not always.  When I showed her the drawing above, our conversation ran like this:

Me: What is this?

Her: Is it a guy with a hat?

Me: Hmmmm.  Well, it’s supposed to be something that you think with.

Her: A thinking cap?

Me: Okay… think about something that is inside your head.

Her: Oh!  I know!  Vitamins and minerals!

Me: … um… good guess, but it’s supposed to be a big brain.

Her: I don’t think so.  Maybe it’s a furry hat!

Who said we were supposed to be our own worst critic?  Whoever it was, I’m guessing they didn’t have kids.