The new voting machines look familiar.

I was going to make few jokes here at the expense of the current presidential candidates, but at this point they honestly don’t need any help.

Things that go “fist bump” in the night.

I know it’s been a long time since I posted any content on this blog, but my kids are growing up a bit and I find I have (slightly) more time on my hands.

Our youngest child is now three years old.  Unlike many others of his age, he has never resisted his bedtime.  In fact, he has a grand time rushing through an increasingly lengthy string of goodnight sayings to each member of the family.  These currently  include: good night, sleep tight, sweet dreams, night night, I love you, and see you in the morning.

However, the speed at which he rattles these phrases off at makes it sounds more like – “Goodnightsleeptightsweetdreamsnightnightiloveyouseeyouinthemorning!”

It is usually the last thing he says before he  closes his door for the final bedtime story and snuggle with his Mom.

However, the other night he opened the door again seconds after closing it.  I waited to see what adorable phrase he was adding to the mix now.

He looked at me with his large ernest eyes and said very quietly, “Our house doesn’t have any ghosts…”

“…anymore.”

The door began to shut again.  Just before it clicked, he cracked it open once more and whispered, “Don’t be scared.”

…

As I said above, I finally have enough time to start posting some new drawings.  Goodness knows I’m not using any of it sleeping anymore.

The spirit is weak, but the chin is strong.

In comic books the guys with big chins are superheros (think Superman and Batman).  In real life we get Quentin Tarantino.  And let’s be honest, he’s no Superman.

His fear of public toilets was becoming a critical issue.

More than any other cartoon I have posted – this is me.  I am absolutely terrified of public restrooms.

Freedom bread.

Remember when french fries and french toast  were renamed “freedom fries” and “freedom toast?”  It seemed silly, but there was actually a precedent.  During World War I we renamed German Measles as “Liberty Measles.”

huh…

I can see wanting to stake a claim on something as tasty as french freedom fries, but wouldn’t it have made more sense to go ahead and blame the Germans for Rubella?

This power tie takes it to the next level.

Personally, I don’t wear ties very often.  I only wear them for weddings or funerals.  Odd that these two events are at opposite ends of the social spectrum, but they have the exact same dress code.  Hmmm.

I own two ties.  I actually only ever wear one of them because the other is very ugly.  I should give the ugly one away, but I can’t.  I’m not sure why.  It could be many reasons, but I think it could be because I need the illusion of choice.  Obviously I’ll never really wear the ugly tie, but as long as it is in the closet I could. Especially if I ever wear the really ugly shirt that also lives in the closet.

Let’s put the “party” back into search party.

Next time you host a search party, make it an unforgettable one.  And if you added dancing and a live band, who wouldn’t want to be found!

Spring fashions of the far north.

It is April 21st and I am still looking at snow in my backyard.  How about you?

Abe Lincoln’s other hat.

Abraham Lincoln was a legend.  When I read his writings or speeches, I am amazed at his ability to express grand ideas with simple words.  He stood firm where others would have failed or compromised.  He exemplified the idea that anyone can succeed despite humble circumstances.

BUT he was born and raised in Kentucky.

So… I’m gonna go with my gut and guess he would have loved NASCAR.

As impulse purchases go, it was a doozey.

The golf bag I drew is based on my own golf bag.  When I was in college I played quite a bit of golf when weather permitted.  Because my friends and I were poor college students, we couldn’t afford to rent clubs and I was the only person who owned a set (a wonderful present from my parents).  This was a problem.  The local course didn’t allow two players to share a set of clubs let alone a foursome.  Our solution:

We each learned to play with three clubs.

My “set” consisted of the putter, a nine iron, and a five iron.  I actually didn’t do too badly.  The original five iron was broken/replaced by one of my friends early on.  He replaced it with a used $8 five iron.   A used children’s $8 five iron.  A used children’s five iron that was also quite blackened and burned from being used repeatedly as a fire poker. (really)

Nevertheless, I can still hit fairly straight and consistent shots of almost 200 yards with my old, used, child-sized, fire poker.  Too bad it’s the only consistent thing in my golf game.

Raise your heart rate without exercise.

I’m not a big fan of soft drinks.  Especially the “colas.”  They are way too sweet for me.  The commercials always show people running or playing basketball and then chugging a Pepsi or Coke or whatever.

Personally, I don’t think my stomach could take that much sugar right after a workout.  It would… rebel.

If you are unlike me, and like soft drinks, then here is a possible benefit you might not have thought of.

You’re welcome.

Dogs in clothes.

The dogs that live in our house wear clothes.  Not all the time, mind you.  Just when they go outside.  That doesn’t make it right.  One dog has a sweatshirt just like the one in the picture.  That’s bad – but it isn’t the worst.

One of them has a fur coat.

And just so there isn’t any confusion, I’m not talking about the fur coat it was born with.  During winter when our dog does it’s business, it does it in a (faux) fur coat.

Has the world gone mad, or just my family?

iCod

My Father loved puns.  He made them all the time.  He thought they were hilarious.  I did not.  The whole family would greet those puns with a uniform groan.

Now look at me.

Dad would be proud.

Would a rose by any other name…

Time for some blog stats!

• Total number of posts = 50
• Days since blog began = 72
• Total number of drawings = 76
• Most visitors in a single day = 140
• Different visitor countries of origin = 19  (United States, United Kingdom, Canada, Brazil, Malaysia, Russian Federation, Taiwan, Belgium, Hong Kong, Pakistan, Turkey, Romania, Israel, Australia, Vietnam, Thailand, Republic of Korea, Singapore, New Zealand)
• Time wasted drawing/scanning/typing = unknown

Reuse, reduce, recycle (just not everything).

I saw recycled toilet paper in the store.  The label said it was made with “80% post consumer content.”  Rationally, I know it was recycled from other types of paper.  However, I can’t seem to shake the irrational fear it may have been toilet paper before.

Intimidating in the ring.

Hmmmm.

I like the idea on this one, but I’m not that happy with the painting.  It looks pretty rushed.  Probably because it was.  Oh well.

It’s only a 15 watt idea.

It wasn’t until I drew this that I realized ideas in cartoons are symbolized by lightbulbs because they are “bright ideas.”

That is probably something I should have figured out earlier in life.

Ninjabread man.

The Ninjabread Man.

Someone needs to update the classic story with this twist.  It would be the best children’s book.  Ever.

He never has bad hair days.

Wow.  With different eyes and a squiggle on his shirt, this guy would look like Charlie Brown.

Now it’s ultimate frisbee.

The term “ultimate frisbee” is a misnomer.  Adding an exciting descriptor doesn’t really make a sport any more impressive.  If it did, everyone would be playing extreme horseshoes and ultra bocce.